Motherhood, Personal,

Happy Mother’s Day

Happy Mother’s Day!

For the five strongest, bravest, and most loving women in my life.

When I first found out I was pregnant, I was so eager to share the news with my mothers, and grandmothers. As the only granddaughter, and the only daughter, I wanted to share these moments with the women in my family. Their support meant everything to me. After all, this was something I have been talking about my entire life, starting a family, starting MY family. This opened me up to many emotions, and even more memories of my own childhood began to resurface.

As a child, both of my grandmothers encouraged me to pursue my passions. Carol taught me grace, kindness, and acceptance. Diane taught me acceptance, hard work, my heritage, and traditions. Carol sparked my passion for writing by teaching me that writing can be an outlet to express my thoughts and emotions clearly. She fueled my curiosity to explore new worlds through books. Diane is a constant reminder that family is family through the good times and the bad. She was keen to emphasize humility in every point of my life- highs, and lows.

My grandmother, Carol, is no longer with us. She passed away in February of this year and it shook me to my core. I honestly don’t think there is someone who loved me as much, or unconditionally like she did. She was the kindest soul, not a mean bone in her body. She was incredibly strong and endured so much during her life. I miss her dearly with each passing day. I don’t think this blog, or my imagination, or sense of creativity would be possible without her.

My grandmother, Diane, is still with us. She is extremely busy running her household and running around helping out her two grandsons. She is strong and selfless. Most women who retire go on trips, or catch up on much-needed sleep. Instead, she took it upon herself to invest her free time and resources into caring for her grandsons. She became their homeschool teacher during the pandemic. She became their teacher and role model, just as she has always been one of mine.

My mothers (Mom and Stepmom) are very unique. The two women couldn’t be more similar yet so different from one another. My mom and stepmom didn’t have the greatest relationship to start with. I don’t think that is really a surprise though. I think this goes without saying as that is often the case. However, I was fortunate that the two of them came together to form an incredible bond- so incredible that when the three of us would get coffee in the morning the barista would ask whose daughter I am. They would reply with “both”.

My mother, God love her, has been the worst disciplinary person in all of history. I mean that. I really really really do. Mom if you’re reading this… you know it’s true. She would take my phone to ground me and less than an hour later, I would have it back in my hand and I would be texting away. If she said no, you could ask her one or two more times and the answer would change. Worst disciplinary ever. However, this is one of the most selfless women you will ever meet. I’ve never known someone to sacrifice so much for her family, more than my mother. Some very heavy things try to stay hidden, but even through the eyes of a child, you can see the wear and tear. I saw the sacrifices she made for my brother and me. She taught me how to be nurturing and kind. I also owe a lot of knowledge of cooking to her. Through how she loved me, I learned that when I had a child of my own someday, he would be my greatest blessing, my greatest adventure and he was to always come first.

My stepmom is a resilient woman. It takes a strong and thoughtful woman with a gentle heart to love children that are not hers by blood. There are so many thoughts running through my head about her that it’s hard to pinpoint just one idea to write about. My stepmother taught me to be kind but strong and to never let anything stand between me and my dreams. She is fiercely independent and so much of that has rubbed off on me, especially in recent years. There has been no greater friend or supporter in my life than her. She was the one who fought double standards between my brother and me. She was the one who I would go to the beach with at night, just to talk. She was the older sister I never had but always wanted (I know that may sound weird, but she’s probably my best friend). She is the one I call in a panic because she’s the one to stay level-headed. She is incredible simply for loving me when she never even had to.

Oh, Kimberly Anne (not her real name). I admire her loyalty to her family and her “I am who I am” attitude. She is a remarkable woman. Her dedication to her family and raising her children with values steadfast in acceptance and independence is one of the many reasons I love and respect her. She embraced her children’s hobbies and passions and she became THAT mom. After working all week, she would get up early on Saturday mornings and travel all around for soccer games and then finish the night at the racetrack. If there is a mother who is the picture-perfect definition of supportive and immersed in her children’s (and grandchildren’s) lives, it’s her.

Each of these women has shaped me to be the woman I am today. I like to think I am strong, nurturing, passionate, and family-oriented because of these women. When I question my ability to be a mother, or if I am worthy of being a mother, these women have always eased my concerns. Motherhood is the greatest gift I have ever been blessed with. Raising children, raising my son to be a good man, a respectable man, an honorable man is my greatest aspiration. I am so glad that I have these five remarkable women who have impacted my life. They’ve molded me to become the mother I am today.

As some would say, I am in the trenches of motherhood now. Years ago, they were in the trenches themselves. I am sure they felt the mom guilt, the shame, and the anxiety I do today. Perhaps it isn’t the exact same, but similar. I think it’s a natural crash course in Motherhood. Regardless, this Mother’s Day, I want to say thank you to Fabulous Five women for making me the mother and woman I am today. Thank you for your wisdom, your support, your love, and your guidance. You are all awe-inspiring for your strength, love, and loyalty to your family and I am truly grateful to be your daughter (and granddaughter).

I love you all.

Happy Mother’s Day.